When I Grow Up

Conversations with Adults in Search of Adulthood
Moya Sarner

“Incredibly insightful and helpful. Everyone could learn something from this book.”

Olivia Petter, author of Millennial Love

“Thoughtful … a painfully honest exploration of what it means to be an adult.”

James McConnachie, The Sunday Times

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“Forgoing the societal markers of adulthood, Moya and those she interviews or interacts with, discuss the ways in which they define adulthood for themselves. An interesting process that feels more real than hitting societal markers of adulthood achievement. Overall, this book was a slap in the face of realism and introspection, and I invite you to get slapped in the face by this book too.”

Carrie Wilson

“I loved the case studies … Formatting/cadence reminiscent of Helen Russell (which worked for me). I think anyone feeling adult imposter syndrome or adrift could get something out of reading.”

Jane Fair

“Moya Sarner has written a book about growing up which also happens to be a book about being alive: about managing pain and loss, about uncertainty and change, about humility and courage, about finding meaning and acceptance. She is asking all the right questions, in our uncertain times, and her search for answers is inspiring.

Writing that is full of insight and depth, and always feels refreshing. This book is invigorating and thought-provoking, rigorous, elegant, and compassionate. It is about thinking, healing, and connecting. We need more like it.”

Tom Hiddleston

“A deeply compassionate book that made me think differently about not only what it means to be an adult but also what it means to be a human being.”

Imogen West-Knights

“A journalist and psychotherapist explores what it means to be an adult in a world that often infantilizes … She takes her skills as a journalist and what she has learned about listening to explore the vexed question of what becoming a mature adult personality might entail, and why achieving it has become such a trial and a puzzlement for so many today, herself included.”

Sally Vickers, The Guardian

“Searching and consoling, When I Grow Up interrogates the beliefs we hold about life’s stages, and the labels we yearn for and resist. It is a generous, illuminating exploration of what it means to grow up, why we want to, and how to know when you’ve done it.”

Nell Stevens, author of Bleaker House

When do you become an adult? What does it mean to grow up? And what are the experiences that propel us forward—or keep us stuck?

As we get older, we pass many milestones, but for some of us it can feel as if adulthood is always just out of reach.

Journalist and psychotherapist-in-training Moya Sarner goes on a journey into what growing up really involves, and how we do it again and again throughout our lives. She draws on case studies, as well as her training, and theories of child psychology, psychoanalysis, neuroscience, and more, to explore what it means to be a “grown up” and how we can meet the challenges and opportunities of every stage of our lives.

“Incredibly insightful and helpful. Everyone could learn something from this book.”

Olivia Petter, author of Millennial Love

“Thoughtful … a painfully honest exploration of what it means to be an adult.”

James McConnachie, The Sunday Times

View all reviews

Carrie Wilson

“I loved the case studies … Formatting/cadence reminiscent of Helen Russell (which worked for me). I think anyone feeling adult imposter syndrome or adrift could get something out of reading.”

Jane Fair

Tom Hiddleston

“A deeply compassionate book that made me think differently about not only what it means to be an adult but also what it means to be a human being.”

Imogen West-Knights

Sally Vickers, The Guardian

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Details

Format:Paperback

Size: 8.3in × 5.3in

Extent:304pp

ISBN (13):9781957363141

RRP:$20.00

Pub date:3 Oct 2022

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Moya Sarner

Moya Sarner is a psychodynamic psychotherapist and award-winning freelance journalist based in London. She has written for The Times, The Guardian, New Scientist, Stylist, and other publications. When I Grow Up is her first book.